I never really understood it when all my “new-mommy friends” would say things like, “uhhh we’ll get to that when we’re out of the trenches…” I know that there are equal parts of joy and challenge when entering parenthood, but until it actually happens to you, you really don’t understand what a load it truly is.
First, I must brag: My baby will be 4 months tomorrow and she STILL hasn’t woken me by crying in the night. Now don’t get me wrong… the girl DEFINITELY wakes me up. We just transitioned her to the crib a few days ago, and last night alone I think I was up between 20-30 times (she lost her paci, wanted to move positions, etc). The lack of sleep is definitely the hardest part, but it all melts away as soon as I look at her. I would do this momma thing 100 times over to experience the fullness of love that I have for this sweet child of mine. Next challenge– my arms are NEVER free! Halle is at that stage where she requires me to be her hands to explore any and every thing. Her attention span is short so we are constantly on the move. My one break comes 4 times a week when I get to work out, though I did just snag an AWESOME craigslist find (a like-new jogging stroller for $57!), so maybe I’ll get another hour in each day. My showers are even cut short because my babe wants her momma just about 24/7… haha it’s a wonder that my bedroom floor hasn’t caved in from the billion times I’ve had to run out of the shower, sopping wet– no towel here!– to rock her back to sleep just so I can wash out my shampoo! Whew!
But you know what? For the life of me, I just can’t understand how so many moms out there complain about their babies dependency on them. Maybe I’m a little more sentimental because I waited SO LONG to have her… but I truly find myself teary several times a week as she needs me less and less.
I love the love that I –alone– can give my baby.
So in case any of you are wondering how I’ve adjusted to motherhood…. I ADORE EVERY SECOND OF IT. I constantly find myself shutting off my phone and fighting the temptation to turn on the computer or tv for a few minutes. My daughter is growing so fast and I want to know that I didn’t miss a second of it. Halle is my girl. My sidekick. My bestie. I am enjoying these precious moments of being the complete center of her world.
With all of that said…. I DO need to come out of these glorious trenches to give you guys an adoption update! Since my baby is steadily snoring beside me, I’m going to make this quick. Please forgive any type-o’s or grammatical errors, as I most likely will not have the time to ever come back to fix them. 🙂
1) We ARE indeed switching agencies. Not because we don’t love AGCI… because we do. It actually hurts to put a pause on our relationship with them (we may have future adoptions one day, so we’re keeping that door open). Our adoption will now be with Bethany Christian Services. More on that in a future post!
2) We have put in an offer on our first house. It’s a foreclosure, so our goal is to owner-occupy and flip it within the next yearish… well… that is, if we get it. If this deal does fall through, this is what we are aiming to achieve by the end of the summer. Why is this important for adoption? Because we have to have the renovations done in order for us to move in for our home-study, a key part to the adoption process. So things are kinda hinged on that right now.
3) MOST IMPORTANT AND EXCITING: Even though we are a tad backed-up for the home study paperwork, it doesn’t mean that we cannot start the fundraising process. So HERE WE GO!!!! Ahhh! I can’t believe it’s finally here… I literally have chills rolling down my arms as I’m typing this out! Jordan and I have started a Kickstarter project for this first round of fundraising. Our goal is $10,000. Yes… that sounds like a lot, but some guy LITERALLY just made $65k for making potato salad on kickstarter… POTATO SALAD PEOPLE! I mean… how much farther can your dollar go to rescue two precious babes? You can donate as small as $5, and each amount has different rewards. [For those of you confused about what kickstarter is, haha, no worries… I was there too about a year ago. Once you go to the site, you’ll be able to figure it out, but basically it is a fundraising website. If we do NOT meet our goal within our allotted amount of time, nobody’s donation will go through. BUT if we do raise the $10k within 30 days, then your donation will go through AND you’ll be rewarded a prize based upon your donation amount.] Wouldn’t it be incredible if we raised the full $35,000 up front so that we could have these adoptions paid for in full?! We could literally go get our babies within the next yearish and put new clothes on their backs, food in their bellies, and into a family that deeply loves them. Ah… here come the tears! It almost seems too good to be true, but again… POTATO SALAD. If a guy can raise a dumb $65k to make potato salad, then man… what can our friends and family do for a REAL cause!? LET’S GO!
Ok, so Brandi. Ummm. How in the world do I get to this kickstarter thingy? Why… thank you for asking! Just click this link: We Chose You – Ethiopia Adoption
And off you go!
How amazing would it be to update you next month on what God has done through your generous hearts? I’m on my knees praying… would you join me?
To be honest, I sometimes feel dizzy as we adjust to these new life changes. (Jordan is also pursuing his Doctorate now, along with some other exciting ministry dreams.) I’m just so thankful God is in control. No matter if we make our goal, GOD HAS CALLED US TO THIS. He will see us through it as long as we let Him take the lead. Maybe that’s why Halle has my hands so tied up… so I don’t try to jump in and take control myself. God should get every ounce of glory for fulfilling His will to restore the lost and broken. Grace through my trench, right? Love it.